So my car, my very first ever car, which i have only had for 6 months, my wonderful beautiful fantastic car got broken into last night by a bunch of ratty-ass little shits.
It wasnt enough that the stole everything they could find! NO! They also decided to fuck up my ignition so bad that it is undrivable. And break my rear-view mirror.
I call the police who brought dogs! That was the single coolest thing i have ever seen. The cops were wonderful. I called my insurance company and for some weird reason even though when i signed up for it i requested Comprehensive, they neglected to actually give it to me. So I am screwed like the proverbial pony belonging to Catherine the Great. I am responsible to pay all expenses relating to my car.
To the shit-fuckers who decided to do this?
-karma bitch. You are going to have a pretty shitty life. In fact I can make some assumptions about you right now. You have no education, no job and probably a very tiny dick. Infested with some sort of crotch rot. One can guess that with these type of morals, condoms are not a nessecity. You will amount to nothing as no one trusts you. You will live a welfare filled existence and bitch about how the system keeps you down.
To the parents of these fine young people:
You fucked up. You seriously fucked up. How proud are you to have raised such fine upstanding people? Too busy to pay attention to them? Too poor to be a good parent? You justify your abilities all you want. I hope that they steal all your shit and leave you to rot in a sub-par nursing home. To be looked after by other raging morons whose parents did a bad job raising them.
I went to the bar and got terrifically drunk on tequila. And you know what? It did make me feel better.
Best things about last night?
-coolio police dogs
-jake and shawn and denise
-shawn for driving nicely
-haley for being super
and kris for making sure i didnt do anything horribly stupid.
And lastly, Jon, who even though he is super pissed at me, put it aside to listen to me cry. I think thats the meaning of friendship.
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