Porno conversation

For those of you on the forum I go on, this is an old story. Feel free to read if you want to re-hash.

Briefly last year I had 'relations' with a gentleman of the deaf persuasion. This wasn't dating. This was sex.
I have come to realize that sex with a deaf person is an unusual experience. Here's why:
-most of you make noise during coitus (for those of you who don't...shame!), and your partner can gauge how well he/she is doing by your reactions. Not so in this case! You just end up sounding like you are masturbating to anyone who may be in the vicinity. You are wasting calories! They can't hear you!
Myself, I understood this after awhile. Once I did, I hate to admit i started giggling uncontrollably. The gentleman (let's call him Mr. Q) asked what was so funny. I was afraid to tell him in the off chance he may find it offensive.

-no direction!
You cannot tell your partner such lovely things as : harder! faster! slower! OOOOooooooooohhhhh! THAT'S the spot!
I have to say, myself, I am a direction giver. Why waste my time letting you do something to me i do not fully enjoy?
*note: Unless i am trying to figure out my grocery list or what needs to be done the next day

-no dirty talk at all!
NONE!
It's difficult enough to try to sign to them what you are saying during sex much less try to throw some nasty words in there. You feel ridiculous.

I have no idea how it is for them. I can only say what i know. I found the whole thing extremely enjoyable if a little disconcerting. Mr. Q was very good at what he did. I can only indirectly apologize for any inferrance he took from my maniacal laughter.

But! The upsides! Yes, there are many!
-very close attention is paid to detail! No stone left unturned if you will!
-you dont have to worry about calling your ex's name out. You can call them Santy Claus if that's what gets you off
-pillow talk is at a minimum
-you dont have to worry about THEM calling you by a different name. ( I have had this happen to me. It is not enjoyable at all)
-If you are one of those people who makes disgustingly weird noises, this is perfect for you
BEST OF ALL!!!
-they cant annoy the crap out of you! If you dont want to 'hear' what they are saying, just close your eyes and pretend to go to sleep.

Mr. Q, if you ever read this: Thanks so much for a very interesting and new experience for me. I never would have imagined as a young girl blossoming into womanhood, growing up in the wilds of Southern Ontario, picking berries and rolling in straw, I would ever have this kind of story to tell all the folks back home.

God, diversity is a wonderful thing.